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Rose, the other asshole coworker

Most days at work are either uneventful or full of drama. One of the biggest sources of drama comes in the form of a co-worker we’ll call “Rose”.

Like Karen the Art Thief, she came into Fresh Production having previous experience in the food industry. In Rose’s case, it was waitressing. I imagine as a sassy waitress at a diner who mainly gossips with the customers because all she ever does is talk. She’ll blab about every single thing going on in her life to coworkers and customers alike. I barely speak to the woman yet I know quite a bit about her idiot adult son that still lives with her from having to overhear her irritating voice yak on and on when she should be focusing on her work. She’ll be talking away at the hot case and I can hear her over on the other side of the department where my cake counter is. And all this talking makes her work a million times slower, which gives her more time to talk to whoever she is torturing with her voice. I have gone into sensory overload being exposed to her talking for too long because she’s completely incapable of shutting her goddamn face hole and others have noted headaches after being subjected to her talking for longer periods of time. Her voice is so loud and so grating that I swear she was the inspiration for Black Canary from the DC Comics universe.

When she’s not freely giving every detail of her life to anyone she comes across, Rose is complaining about every little thing to coworkers and management or starting up arguments with other coworkers. I’ve never been on the receiving end of her arguments, but have witnessed plenty of shouting matches from my counter. She usually gets into verbal fights because she tries to boss around the other coworkers about doing tasks that she doesn’t want to do herself—which is almost hilarious since she considers herself the best worker there, but always tries to push the work she should be doing onto someone else and doesn’t even do the bare minimum required of her. It’s the worse when she and Karen get into it because its two entitled, stubborn women getting into a verbal fight. She creates this toxic environment and is nasty to just about everyone she works with, but complains and whines about how people are being “mean” to her because she gets the impression no one likes her (Gee, I wonder why.)

Everyone else is convinced she’s on drugs based on their interactions with her. One coworker told me she bragged about being doped up on Xanax and another coworker said she asked him if he ever tried crack in a way that suggested she has. I personally can’t say for sure, but it might explain a lot. One moment she can be goofy and loopy and the next she can be extremely paranoid or a shouting bitch that wants to watch the world burn.

Like me, she also has intermittent FMLA leave. We know she has intermittent FMLA leave because she’s bragged about it and openly talked about checking how much time she has left of her leave, though we’re not entirely sure what she has sick leave (which is probably the only thing she doesn’t talk about). Everyone thinks she abuses the sick leave because she’ll call in and then someone will see her out and about like she didn’t call in sick. Recently, she called in sick and then came to the store to get meat sliced at the deli counter she was supposed to be working at—she had the nerve to ask if we had been busy.

She will call in for days or even weeks. Sometimes she’s gone so long that we wonder if she’s still working there only to be disappointed when she suddenly reappears one day like Pennywise coming out of the sewer drain. We actually hope she calls in because she creates so much chaos and drama that it’s better for everyone when she doesn’t show up. She’s so horrible that we have been extremely short staffed on some days and we feel relieved when she calls in—we don’t need her extra bullshit on an already stressful day! We know when she has run out of her allotted sick leave because she will show up for every one of her shifts without issue…and she usually bitches about running out of time.

Everyone hates her so much that most of us have been reporting her whenever possible. I don’t mean we got together and had a meeting to discuss reporting her for anything that was worth reporting. We each decided by ourselves that we were going to report her and then realized that’s what everyone else has been doing. I don’t have much interaction with her so I haven’t reported her as much as the others, but I have a few times based on things I’ve observed. The one that sticks out was when she was talking to a customer she knew for five minutes before she even asked what she needed sliced—while customers were waiting in line!—and then proceeded to talk loudly about how taking down confederate statues was racist to white people….the added kicker being that she said this in front of a Native American couple that had been waiting a while and they left soon after.

But no matter how many reports we made, nothing ever came of it despite management not even liking her. We suspected it was because she has openly made threats to go to the Health Inspector if she ever lost her job. She gloats about having “evidence” (photos) that apparently shows the Fresh department supposedly being in violation of health codes. I say “supposedly” because Rose has been known fake a health violation in an attempt to get other coworkers into trouble. (Yes, she’s that nasty to people that she will literally fabricate health violations and then try to pin the fault on another coworker). For example, she once took an entire cart of chilled chicken out of the cooler to the back to warm up to room temperature and then tried blaming another coworker for leaving a cart of chicken out. We figure any photos she supposedly has is from one of these set ups she created herself and we have nothing to worry about since we’ve always passed our inspections. But since management wasn’t doing anything about her, we thought that maybe they decided to just put up with her instead of dealing with the fallout from a vengeful psycho.

Between protected sick leave excusing her absences and supposedly having dirt on the department that she would try to use to take us all down, Rose thought she was untouchable (and—surprise!—has bragged about it). We eventually accepted that we would likely be stuck with her until she either quit, retired, or died and prayed for one of those three scenarios to happen swiftly.

Yesterday, I came back from lunch thinking the rest of the day was going to be average and uneventful when my coworker told me, “You missed all the fun! Rose got escorted out of the building by management!”

I had to have him repeat himself to make sure I heard right—coworkers aren’t escorted out of the building by management unless they have been fired. He repeated himself, confirming I had indeed heard him right. “She’s gone!” he said gleefully. My brain went, “OMG…I can’t believe it…this anxiety inducing bitch is gone! Here! Have ALL the endorphins!” I was so happy I could cry. No more overhearing her talk about everything to everyone she came in contact with! No more headaches or anxiety attacks because of her voice! No more witnessing fights because she likes to start shit up with everyone! No more praying with everyone else that she called in so we wouldn’t have to put up her bullshit! No more coworkers getting absolutely frustrated as fuck because of the chaotic shit she would start up!

From what I could gather between all the coworkers I talked to, sometime during my uneventful lunch, Rose had been pulled into the office to be fired.  She made threats to go to the health inspector. When that didn’t work, she was screaming so loud that apparently people in the break room next door could hear her. Either I was out in the store figuring out lunch when this happened or couldn’t hear her from the old smoking room connected to the break room. Per normal protocol, management escorted her out of the building, but she stopped at the Deli counter to say some words to another coworker about how she was unjustly being fired. Our department manager compared the whole thing to a cartoon villain vowing revenge after having his plans foiled by Batman while being towed to Arkham Asylum.

I’ve been with this company for almost ten years and I have never seen such a boost in employee morale. Everyone was instantly happier and ecstatic upon either personally witnessing her getting booted from work or being told what had went down. The whole department, including myself, does not feel pity for this woman because she was so incredibly nasty to almost everyone that it stressed everyone out and was vindictive enough that she was willing to try and take everyone down with her.

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